The Caustic Club
The Caustic Club is an organisation dedicated to preserving human connections in conditions of acceptable dignity. Excessive displays of sentimentality are not prohibited, but they are strongly discouraged. Its activities are based primarily on the exchange of cards and the more or less controlled use of irony.
The Caustic Club also has one distinctive feature: the way it broadcasts.
Writing a card officially makes you a member.
Receiving one puts you at a significant risk of contamination.
Experts have not yet been able to determine precisely how the phenomenon spreads. The initial symptoms generally include an involuntary smile, mild irritation, or an uncontrollable urge to retort. In 5.32 per cent of recorded cases, the subject reoffends. In the remaining cases, there is insufficient data or witnesses stubbornly refuse to cooperate.
The Club currently takes the form of a collection of cards. This situation is bound to escalate. Other creations will gradually join the ranks in order to extend our influence across the realm of human interaction.
At this stage, it’s probably too late.
You’re already a member of the Club.
Welcome.
Diogène de Rance
The Caustic Club currently has a president.
Nobody elected him, but that does not prevent him from carrying out his duties with remarkable diligence.
His name is Diogenes de Rance, a misanthropic frog and lover of luxury goods.
In an ideal world, Diogenes would spend his days on a water lily, sipping cocktails and judging humanity from afar. Unfortunately, he has an expensive passion for sturgeon caviar and premium dragonflies. He is therefore forced to to have a job, pay his bills and live as part of society.
A situation he is coping with with only relative dignity.
Diogène apparaît sur toutes les cartes de la première collection. Il est le premier représentant du Club, mais probablement pas le dernier. D’autres personnages viendront sans doute agrandir cette étrange assemblée au fil du temps.
In the meantime, he’s the one who welcomes new members.
The Foundress
This biography was written by Anma herself, in the third person singular, as important people do, evidently.
Anma spent several years working in the social and humanitarian sector, observing human nature in all its splendid reality. She could have drawn some reassuring conclusions from this.
It was not the case.
Amongst other flaws, she also has British roots, which no doubt explains her stubborn attachment to the lost art of the greeting card.
Then, like any thirty-something city-dweller going through a back-to-basics phase, she took up making handmade soap. That’s how she discovered the joys of caustic soda: a subtle burn, almost imperceptible at first, which sets in slowly before revealing just how harmful it can be.
An experience that was memorable enough to inspire the name of this project.
The Caustic Club came into being somewhere between these observations on humanity, a slight weariness with the pressure to be constantly happy, and a period of spending enough time in the stationery aisles to arouse the staff’s suspicion.
The intention was simply to create a few cards.
Since then, events have taken a slightly more worrying turn. A chairperson has been appointed without an election. Members are joining without going through the admission procedure. Cases of infection continue to be reported.
At this stage, it is difficult to determine whether Anma set up the Club or whether the Club simply used her to come into being.